Two Months

And just like that that you’ve doubled your little life, sweet one! It seems like just yesterday I held you for the first time; a little wrapped up bundle topped with a mess of light colored hair going in every direction. I was completely overwhelmed in my love for you in that moment, entranced by the magic of holding this little life that somehow I had a part in making. I can still taste the salt on my lips, as tear after tear rolled down my face. Since then, we’ve spent hours and hours together in that same position, with you in your mama’s arms, and I will never look at you differently than I did that first time.

Now two months have passed, and although your legs may already be spilling over my lap, there are certain things about our time together haven’t changed. For one thing, you are so peaceful when you sleep, and you have been since you were born. There can be a million and one things I need to check off on my To-Do list, but many times I wouldn’t dare disturb you. In those moments I’d much rather feel your tummy steadily move up and down against me as you breathe or listen for soft whimpers as you dream. Then how about when you are awake? I can spend hours looking down at your big, bright eyes examining the world around you- you are such a curious boy! My favorite, though, is when I catch your gaze. There is nothing like when you start talking to me in your own little language (you started that earlier this month!) or smile up at me looking right into my eyes. My whole world seems to stop when you look up at me, little one. I know I will always treasure these times with one another.

One of the greatest things about being a mother has been savoring these “little” moments we have had. I have tried to make a point of truly being in the moment with you, and even when we have had a long, hard day I never want to take this time I’ve been given for granted. I don’t want to miss out on looking at any of those gummy smiles, or listening to you talk to yourself, or even rocking you for hours to help you fall asleep. Being your mother is one of the greatest gifts God allowed me to have, and I will never stop thanking Him for entrusting you to me. I hope you know how much you are cherished, sweet one. Never forget that your mama loves you and will never stop holding you, not for as long as I live.

All this to say, Happy Two Months, sweet Emmett.